Running Cards Against Humanity

My roommates and I were playing a game, Cards Against Humanity, so naturally my brain wandered to how this could work for runners. Here’s the gist, everyone gets 10 cards with words of phrases on them, these are the answer cards. One person then draws from another stack of cards with a question or phrase as it, this is the prompter card. Everyone then looks through their deck of answers and puts down one of their words they think best fits.

If you’re a little confused, we’ll just get going and you’ll understand. I’ll give you some prompts….
running shoes
1) That smell emanating from the back of the room is ____________.

A) The Mt. Everest of dirty running clothes I’m putting off washing.
B) New scented BodyGlide.
C) Explosive diarrhea fumes wafting from my trail run.
D) Swassy
E) Add your card!
vibram shoes
2) TSA’s latest airline restrictions now ban __________.

A) Spikes.
B) More than 2oz of energy gel.
C) Anyone not wearing compression socks.
D) The dork who created Vibrams.
E) Add your card!

3) The last time I felt the overwhelming desire to ____________ I just had to indulge and _________________.

A) Be a glutton for punishment/skipped putting on BodyGlide before my marathon.
B) Prove my awesome directional skills/turned a 4 mile run into a 9 mile run.
C) feel on top of the clouds/ran. #endorphinhigh
D) punch someone in the face/ran the ‘surprise’ interval coach told me to…THEN punched him in the face. ;) jk. [disclaimer: I don't condone punching your coach in the face...haha.]
E) Add your card!
run for pancakes
4) I awoke with a start, sweat pouring down my face, I had just had my worst nightmare.

A) My Garmin stopped working during my tempo run. [side-note, I actually HAD that happen...my OCD is still trying to recover.]
B) I showed up to the track, looked down, and realized I’d forgotten to wear any running shorts.
C) I’d finished my long run, had dreamed of a mountain of pancakes for 16 miles…only to get to the diner and have them tell me it was TOO LATE…they stopped serving breakfast!!
D) Trying to do repeats on the track when all of a sudden a parade of walkers took over, walking side-by-side the full width of the track.
E) Add your card!

Did that last one give you vicarious chills?? Go…run, embrace all our quirky running humor!

What are some of the cards you would put in as answers to any of the above prompter cards??

Running Rocks Your Life and Runners Going Global

Running, life, games, and puzzles. We all know where things should fit in. ;)

game of life with running

world running puzzle

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More running motivation HERE!!

Laughs? Cartoons and Comics HERE!

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1) What was your favorite game as a child?
Hungry Hungry Hippos anyone?
2) What is one way you’ve seen runners or running impact the world and do good?
Quite a few. The Hall’s Steps Foundation, the Love Mercy Foundation, and California Runners!! Love all this!!

Gettin Your Fight Club On – We Play by My Rules Though

Happy Friday!! I hope you all are ready to kick off a fun weekend. Things around here have felt a little too ‘seriousy’ for me, so we obviously need to inject some kind of immaturity.

I’m also sitting on the verge of a minor/not-so-minor Hulk style flip out. Why? My computer and this slow butt internet has been working my last nerve!!!!! That whole Office Space scene of them just kicking the shiznit out of that piece of equipment, I wish I could do just that.

I know logically pounding on it won’t do a lick of good but the amount of instant satisfaction is almost just too tempting to pass up. I’ve never actually been in a real smack-down style fight with anyone…

rocky dog fighter

Pic I made for my family...they've got a Boston Terrier named Rocco

…I think the closest I’ve ever really come to honestly physically trying to overpower someone was in a struggle over a chair with my brother. Sibling moments at their finest, but this was one time we did cross that line between ‘haha, I want that chair’ and ‘I don’t care who the heck you are, or the fact that it’s over something idiotic, I’m going to try to kick your butt’ territory. I was 18, my brother 16; he outweighed me by probably a good 60-70 pounds and had a foot on me. You probably know how it ended, he got the chair, but I tell you he got it a lot harder than he thought he would. Oh, and in my mind I totally creamed him. ;)

On the subject, I’ve always harbored secret fantasies of being all street tough and like I really could win in any kind of fight…heck, I can barely come out on top of most verbal ones. That, and being that I love me my Fight Club, (okay, back when Brad Pitt wasn’t tainted by Jolie, he was hot!) I’ll start my own little knock-off. I’ll share a few rules:

  • We can talk about this fight club, but only if I win. That’s right, just like any other sore sport I can’t have you bringing up my failures. If I’m not in the fight, then you can brag all you want.
  • Races seem to feel okay about charging an arm and a leg to enter, then I’ll follow suit. You want to fight? I wear a size 8.5 Nike Structure Triax, I also want me some Franz Blueberry English Muffins.
  • We don’t have weight divisions, but we instead rely on the PO scale: levels of pissed-offness. It’s all about the size of the fight in the dog, in this case it’s about the amount of pure rage adrenaline this sucker’s running off of.
  • We don’t use weapons. If there is an object in your hand then it better be the item that your rage is directed towards…example: computer.
worthog farting

Farting would be an accpetable way around the 'no weapon' rule though...

**Disclaimer: To state the obvious, the above is all a fictitious rambling and in no way represents anything I stand for or believe in. In reality I’d probably get the snot knocked out of me by mini-me, I’d drop to the floor faster than a hot potato…I vividly remember that Holyfield vs. Tyson, I’m not willing to lose part of my ear or any other bodily extensions. Finally, failures do make us better and hungrier for the next round, so I’m not saying losing sometimes isn’t a bad thing (heck, there are some egos out there who deserve a swift loss).

1) What was the last inanimate object that was the bane of your current existence and focal point of your utter rage?

2) Have you ever been in a ‘real’ fight?

3) Do you have a rule you’d like to add to our fictitious knock-off Fight Club?

4) Any fun weekend plans?

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Bustin Out the ‘Would You Rathers’…

So I kicked off the day with a nice run to the cacklings of Hooda and Kathie Lee. At one point I’m almost certain Kathie Lee called Hooda fat; it came when Hooda said she celebrated the 4th at a city she used to dance at and they flashed up a picture of her. It was a weird picture but looked like a promo flier, Hooda was doing some jump in the air and she explains, “Oh, that’s an old picture from my dancing days, not obviously from last night,”and I could have sworn Kathie Lee quips, “That’s what I thought or I was going to say MAN you really filled out!”

Seriously? If I were Hooda I would be having NONE of that. The fact that that hour of the Today show was even on is a testament that there really needs to be a better selection in the am hours TV wise…even E! had failed me as there was some old movie on. Alas, alas, well those 8 plus miles rolled by regardless.

Today I thought I’d play one of my favorite little games of ‘Would You Rather.’ So here we go, and I implore you to pick a few to answer yourself, or all of them if you’re really cool beans!

1) Would you rather be cursed with stubby,wide, short feet or extremely long and skinny ones?

I’d go with short; I know that it might suck to have them fat but if they are short I know they can make little feet prosthetics to fit into a regular shoe. I know, Kristi Yamaguchi has only semi-formed feet and had to have these prosthetics inserted into her skates to help fill them out. I’d go that route; if they were too long they’d no doubt slam into the front of the treadmill.

2) In workout purgatory left to forever do Burpees or instead Sumo wrestling this guy?

Ouch…Burpees? Better that than become a pancake I think.



3) Stuck without internet for a week or the use of your phone?

Take my phone.

4) (Now we’re going to kick it up in the grossness factor, so you’ve been warned) Dunked into a pool of urine (not your own) or locked out of the gym locker room naked for five minutes?

Naked, not that I’m that body confident just that I’m THAT skeezed out by other people’s bodily fluids.

5) Wrought with explosive diarrhea on the treadmill (no bush to find relief) or projectile vomit attack?

Probably poopy…at least that way people wouldn’t think I’m just out of shape and trying to prove something on the treadmill.

6) Hold a world record in the event of your choice but you look like someone of the opposite gender (don’t worry you’re steroid free) or win Miss Universe but be a total space cadet?

I think maybe the world record…but I’m torn because I’m sure dealing with the drug accusations would be tough even if you’re clean and plus looking like a man wouldn’t be cool. On the other hand I think most of the space cases aren’t aware that they are so lacking in brains and they do say ignorance is bliss.

7) Be able to fly or hold your breath underwater forever?

I’ve always been obsessed with mermaids.

8) Be able to eat anything forever and never gain an ounce or have a limitless supply of money and never have to work for it?

Food orgie baby! :)

9) Trapped as Lindsay Lohan’s care taker for a year, you have to follow her everywhere regardless of what she does for the year or Charlie Sheen’s for 6 months…same rules apply?

LiLo.

10) Forced to give up an appendage; loss of your arm or leg?

You can have both my arms if you want but leave my legs intact!!!

11) Bonus Rando one, not really a ‘Would You Rather’. Turned into a food, what are you?

A big old hunk of cookie dough. Then again being Count Chocula would be a little fitting.

That’s all for today and I’m sorry if I wasn’t able to be more exciting with my questions. Feel free to toss up one of your own!! :)

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