Warning: You’re talking to a runner and I might be secretly laughing at you on the inside

A runner goes through different phases the longer they are involved in the sport.They gradually start to slip away from the ‘norm’ in degrees, sometimes so slight it’s not even noticeable, until of course they reach the point of no return and have fallen all the way down the runner rabbit hole.

evan jager

Us crazy runners actually running towards pain! ;)

Upon entering that ‘hole’ the way you view certain things and your opinion of what is ‘normal’ when it comes to exercise and activity seem to be a bit skewed from the rest of the populous. This happens for a few reasons and in part because we recognize that, to a degree, suffering IS a part of our sport no matter what level we pursue it. Suffering isn’t something the body is naturally hard-wired to run towards, actually the opposite, so in conditioning ourselves as runners we do tend to distance ourselves from the logic or inklings of others.

All that said, obviously being a smart runner is well, the smart thing, and being able to differentiate different kinds of pain is crucial. No need to be martyrs or gluttons for purposeless pain and suffering! However, there are instances when I know I can’t be alone in at least smirking or laughing on the inside at what some people say, do, or think in regards to running and working out. Let me be a little more specific…

“I really miss working out, but I can’t because I’ve got some really bad blisters.” Umm, yea blisters suck, I don’t think those Hanes socks are doing you any favors. But to be honest blisters and gnarly feet still happen no matter how much you try and prevent them…pretty sure when I peeled of my sock this morning the entire top half was red. At least my blister popped en-route to offer some relief.

“What pasta dishes do they have here? I’ve got a 5k tomorrow and I need to carbo-load,”said preemtively to ordering the never-ending pasta bowl and going back for three refills. Can anyone say pasta-logged? And more to the point I’m sure they’ll be retaining some water there too! Actually it’s okay and normal to eat like that on a nightly basis, but that’s only if you’re running more than 20 miles a week.

audrey hepburn

I love her, but a laughing fit does not a workout make. ;)

“Is it safe for me to run today, my calf is sore?” That’s it, wow, I’d take just a single niggling pain as a GOOD day. The runners body is an ongoing squeaky wheel with ongoing maintenance. I may end up in a Rascal by 40 but I’ll be happy until then!

Twitter update: “Just finished a 2 mile run!!” To be fair I swiped this from Karen’s comment on this post, but I see/hear this all the time. Just smile, congratulate them and maybe not mention that is usually your warm-up. ;)

I know, I’m being a bit snarky (shall we revisit this post: Runner’s World vs. Running Times?) and I jest as I DO know not everyone out there rattles off the term ‘short 4-miler’…I get that and I’m happy for anyone who gets sweaty in some way! But I think we runners deserve to be able to poke a little fun here and there, am I right?

Even if I’m wrong, so be it. But I can make fun of myself and other runners just as much. We are the BodyGlide loving, the shoe whore addicts, the people who are at times guilty of a quick clothes change and deodorant rubs in lieu of a shower when really pinched for time, and we tend to have our own neurosis tied to numbers, miles, and times. So there, everyone has been laughed at in good humor. :)

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In case you haven’t noticed I now have an Etsy Store: CaitChock so if you like any of my work and thus would like prints that’s an easy option! :) Also feel free to let me know if there is something you’ve seen that isn’t listed up there and I can get that squared away for you.
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1) What’s something that’s been said or done by a ‘normal’ person or a runner who isn’t necessarily as serious as you that’s made you smile and chuckle on the inside?

2) Now is your opportunity to share one of your own little running neurosis or idiosyncrasies? If we can’t laugh at ourselves we can’t make fun of others! ;)
Where to start? If I’m running on a treadmill I always have to go at least a bit smidgen further than the distance I had planned, to take into account for the treadmill’s ramp-up time. As in I’d have to go at least 6.1 or so to count it as a 6 miler.

3) Things have been a bit serious in blogs as of late, so share something that’s happened to you lately that’s funny or that other runners would appreciate. Let’s help lighten the mood. :)

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20 Responses to Warning: You’re talking to a runner and I might be secretly laughing at you on the inside

  1. I had to laugh at the pasta before a 5km run point – I do find it amusing when people think they need to eat lots pre or post exercise that isn’t all that intense. I guess I’d be equally ignorant if I tried to talk about some subjects though, and at least it’s entertaining :)

  2. hahahaha. this is so true, and sometimes the things people say about workouts make me giggle. I’ve heard the pasta one before (not from a lesser runner, from a teammate of mine who just didn’t know anything about fueling for…the 3k steeple hahah. and yes, she felt super bloated for the meet the next day lol), as well as the “I have a 5k tomorrow, how many Gu’s do you think I need?” and “I did a really tough elliptical workout today, I need to eat extra protein”. Its funny, but I do think you’re right in that it’s important to keep the lolz all in good fun and be happy that others are at least being active ! And to remember that running isn’t necessarily the biggest/best workout (though it is my favorite/makes me happiest) – being on a road bike for two hours does indeed burn more calories than a 7 miler, as I’m finding out. And yep, as long as I can laugh at myself as a runner, and laugh at myself as a cyclist, then I can laugh at other people….and perhaps kindly explain to them that they do not, in fact, need Gu during a 5k :-P

    • oh, and the people who take the cups of water or stuff during a 5k! tee hee…it’d have to be a race on the sun to make me take the effort/time to grab for water/fuel for a 5…lol.

  3. Love this post again. Hmmm, what to say? Yes, running through pain comes natural. I would keep running through it, if I knew that it wouldn’t injure things. There’s a big difference between running through pain as opposed to running through injury. Pain usually eases up once you get warmed up, and an injury gets worse. But yes, I have my own secret weird runner thoughts I dont’ share with others. I just smile and nod. For example, “Wow, you ran six miles at lunch!” a co-worker says amazed, where I’m thinking, ‘i know, six miles, it’s a damn shame.’
    I’m going to filter most of my snarky remarks, but i hear what you’re saying.

    As for as runners world, i think you have it right on spot and I can hear you there too. Not to mention, I think the mag rehashes the same article every few issues, pastes a new non-sweaty runner on the cover, and calls it new. That said, I’ve begged them to review my book. (don’t let them read this. Ahhh!!!)

    • haha…it’s funny because people KNOW i’m really sick, hurt, or near death if i say, “look, it’s so bad i didn’t even run today.” ;) and oh, runner’s world, them and their glistening perfectly poised cover models…have love them. ;)

  4. Pasta logged love it! I have never thought of it like that. You really made me laugh today with this post! Thanks. And as for something funny in my day, my daughter put a sign on our brand new garden saying no bunnies welcome in our garden and we are really hoping the sign works along with the fence we put around it. But the sign makes me smile everytime I look at it. I am. sure my neighbors think we are silly.

    • do feel free to use that pasta logged term liberally….jk. haha..thanks for sharing about the little sign, that is way too cute!! :)

  5. VanessaG

    I’m new to your blog. I’ve been reading for a couple weeks. I love it!! I really loved today’s post. It is soooo true and so funny!! Some of my mind bogging comments I’ve received is “so how long is your Marathon”?, ot

    • thank u so very much and thank u more for commenting!! :) glad u could relate to the post, and great marathon comment, it sounds eerily like this one i heard, “so, a lap around the track is a mile, right?” ;)

  6. I sort of adore this post – but especially the part about not running because of a blister or some calf pain! I’d kill for a day when only my calf hurt or I just had a blister (instead of two completely missing big toenails)!

  7. You are so on point. Runners are so funny- i always crack up when, before like the turkey trot, people are doing crazypants dynamic stretches and running up and down the street, just to like do a 2 mile jog walk. Then undo all the good they do with gatorade and a smoothie. Also, and I know this is stupid, but it bugs me when people wear their race shirts before the race or at the race. Im always thinking its bad luck to count your chickens… For me, I do the same bike trail, the same loops, every time. Even on a long run, unless Im feeling like some crazy adventure woman, I just add loops. So dumb. but predictable.

    • oh my gosh the shirt thing!! i agree with u on that but what is WORSE is i’ve seen people wear shirts for races and run they haven’t even done; sorry but if u didn’t run it, wearing the boston marathon finisher shirt just seems a little wonky. :P

  8. Ok, I have to share this one with you. There is this girl who signed up for a half and then posted about it on facebook. One of her friends was like “why don’t you just do the whole marathon with me” and she was like “sure, it’s not that much further than a half marathon right…like 30kms?”………her friend did point out that a full marathon does actually include two half marathons ;) Had a bit of a lol at that one. My weird thing is that I only ever do an even amount of reps in interval/ speed/ hill training, even if that means doing one more or less than I had planned.

    • okay, sorry but that girl has to be a bit of a doof, or maybe the running and lack of oxygen has left her a little too tired to think right. :P running-isms aside, i’m sorry but not putting two and two together of what half vs. full means seems a little slow. ;)

  9. What gets me is when people use the term marathon when not talking about the distance. A lady I know did her first 5K and put up pictures on facebook in an album called “Divas 5K marathon”… as if marathon and race mean the same thing. I don’t think beginners really know the differences in everything with running so better to bear with it than turn someone off from the sport, but still!

    My local gym had a “pasta party” the night before a 5K/10K race in March. Way to promote the carbo loading myths as well as eating a new food at an all-you-can-eat party the night before a race…

    • hahaha…okay i would be tempted to leave a comment on that album, “so when did 3.1 and 26.2 become the same distance??” ;) is that snarky of me?? lol

  10. I LOVE both of these pics–I always love guessing who the inspiration is! A little Jager Bomb action? Trials madness is getting closer!!!

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