Posts in the Kankled Avenger Category at

People Who Need to Shut-up And Our Next Running Superhero!

Posted on June 7, 2011 by Cait — 3 Comments ↓

Can’t sleep at 3am, what’s a girl to do? Blog of course! Oh, me and sleep have such a fickle relationship. At any rate, I was able to wrangle up our newest addition to the Supa’ Runnas and have our fourth comic to present.

I’ll give you a little backstory about TexasGirl and why we’ve chosen Flagpole Willy to be her first order of business. In life, there are always those people who just seem to know everything about anything. (I’ve got one in my own family, no joke last Christmas this person held a conversation with my cousin and told her that HE knew the right best brand of tampons.) The person who always has to have the last say and the person who just won’t shut up sometimes.

In today’s times lots of people are able to share knowledge, interesting tidbits, and personal opinions in countless ways. I’m doing so myself on a blog. There’s both good and bad about this. There is an opportunity to learn SO much and connect with so many people via social networking sites, blogs, websites, message boards, etc. The bad is that anyone can write anything. They can call themselves experts if they wish and they can say anything behind the ‘safety net’ of a computer screen.

It’s then up to us as readers to sift fact from fiction, experts from frauds, and mindless drivel from entertaining stuff. I’m hoping my own ramblings fall somewhere on the side of entertaining but I’m sure that’s not always the case. The thing with the internet is that it can grant you the liberty of anonymity. Sometimes there are things that just should not be said or at least not in the way they are stated. Not with the purpose being solely to hurt another person.

I’m all for laying it all out there, I’m not afraid to tell people the truth, and I’m also in full backing of everyone having their own opinions! But sometimes human nature is to tear down a person to make themselves feel better. Cut to Lindsay Lohan pre-crack days in Mean Girls. We can’t stop people from saying whatever they’re going to say, but we CAN choose to actually listen to them.

Much easier said than done, I know. I like the quote by Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” If you have a dream, keep chasing it. If you make a mistake, okay that sucks, learn from it and get better…own it but don’t let it destroy you.

I love asking people for their thoughts, opinions, and feedback. The only way to get better at something is to learn from those who know more or have the experience. But you’ve got to also consider the source. I really care what certain people may think, but I’m learning to not give a second thought to what Joe on the street has to say. Not saying I’m totally there yet but I’m a lot more secure than I used to be.

Back on track here…TexasGirl is tackling a person who feels they indeed know it all. Don’t have to go into too many specifics, BUT if we’ve got a villain I’ve got to give you good reason to hate on him, don’t I?! hehe. He feels women are inferior in all ways and their only duties are to pump out babies and serve their hubbies. He has a list about what makes a ‘Real Man’ and they date back to the 50’s. He’s every kind of phobic and has a really big gut. (I really don’t know about that last part but I wanted to add it in.)

Willy hides behind a particular message board and spits his vile ramblings like gerbils shott poop pellets. But he’s finally ticked off the wrong runner and she’s taking action!

Sorry for this being such an epic post, it may sound sort of random but I wanted to make sure that for anyone who has no clue who this Willy dude is and the message board reference, they could still take away something from my post. We all have people who we’d like to just shut up, so we can all collectively take a little glee from watching TexasGirl’s victory.

1) In movies do you like to root for the good guy or the bad guy?

2) Have you ever sported a pair of bunhuggers? Do you have no clue what a bun hugger is? hehe.

(Blogger is really bugging me, to get a better view and actually read the words click on the pic!)

Powdered Donuts, Pre Meet And Our Third Super Hero Runner

Posted on June 3, 2011 by Cait — 13 Comments ↓

Couple things to cover for today. First on the list is a question I have for anyone who is actually reading this: when you run in hot conditions do you get lots of that satly white stuff all over you afterwards? I get it, and I know it’s just the dried up salt from my sweat (and I’m convinced I’ve got overactive sweat glands…I’m a drippy mess) but I seem to be the only person I know besides my mom who comes out looking like a pretzel after running when it’s hot.

No, it’s not suddenly 90 degrees here in Portland (though it is warming up and looks like it’ll be spiking in a few days) but the gym in my apartment complex was disgustingly hot today. Their measly single fan does NOT get the job done come summertime, so my tready run left me a powdered donut. Did another 3 miles warm-up, 5 miles hard, and a cool-down followed by some arm weights. The first 2-3 miles of the harder part felt pretty good, but not gonna lie that last mile I was certainly counting down the minutes left. 😉

Second on the agenda….big weekend on tap for track and field: The Prefontaine Classic! Can I get a whoot-whoot? Okay, it’s established I’m a dork so I don’t feel bad writing that. Also not gonna lie, I’m really mostly following the distance events that are going on Friday night, namely the women’s 5k and the men’s 10k. Both fields are stacked and there should be some fast times. For the women I’m a little partial and will be rooting for Kara and Eloise…so if you’re reading this you should be too! 🙂

So in honor of the upcoming races (and there will obviously be PLENTY of action on Saturday) I’d like to unveil our third member of the Supa’ Runnas; joining The Kankled Avenger and The Cranky Hamstring we have…wait for it, wait for it: PreMONTaine. See what we did there?

The scoop on the second person brave enough to throw themselves into the rigorous application process is this: By day this standout photographer (really, do check out Derek’s site) is using his keen eye to scope out the perfect shot, be it at a sporting event or catching the lovey-dovey moments shared between man and wife as they say their ‘I Do’s’. Don’t let my sarcasm fool you, those special days should be cherished and remembered forever, that raw emotion expressed from candids are always my favorite.

Though, there is much more to the man behind the lens. He’s obviously a runner but doing so in sub-zero weather during a Duluth (Gooooodmorning Duluth! had to add that, sorry) winter takes some…well, balls. Trails are his game but all that running sure makes a fella hungry, thus enter his love affair with hot dogs, steaks (he ate his way through the Prime Quarter 48 oz’er and sides challenge in Madison, WI), and enough skittles that should send him into a diabetic coma. Sadly, he is wrong in his stance on Qdoba being better than Chipotle, but The Kankled Avenger was willing to look past that.

What our mighty runner CANNOT stand for is this: those cantankerous gym teachers that don’t understand that as members of the cross-country or track teams, when hard intervals are planned for that afternoon’s workout it’s not smart to force these runners into doing laps during PE. Now, PE is insanely important in forcing the growing number of slothy youth masses who don’t move on a regular basis, but my stance is that cross and track runners HARDLY fall into this category. (along with lots of other rigorous sport’s team members) So, sorry Mrs. Nelson, you’re wrong on tooting that whistle and you just cheesed off the wronger harrier. Using his wits and of course trusty camera, PreMONTaine is out to fight for all us runners who regulatory bust our own butts hard enough and don’t need to run extra laps in PE. Check out his pilot episode at the bottom folks!

Lastly, I really hope I’m not the only powdered donut looking runner out there and remember to root for my girls! 🙂

1) Have you turned into a salty pretzel after runs in hot weather?

2) What’s your stance on PE for kids who are already participate in highly active sports?

I think that if you’re already doing sports and getting plenty of activity, it should be optional. Shocking coming from me, but my reasoning is this: I LOVE being active and trying new things but I’ve also gotten injured doing stupid things in PE. Not only that but I was also tripped by some doof guy who didn’t want a girl to beat him in the little mile and a half run, I fell pretty hard and got banged up…not fun.

One Hungry Boston Terrier and Caving to Peer Pressure

Posted on May 26, 2011 by Cait — 4 Comments ↓

Whoa baby…I’ve gotten a little headachy thanks to working with that blasted Sharpie. No, I wasn’t trying to be the ‘cool’ kid in 4th grade who thinks that the awesome thing to do in arts and crafts is to attempt to get a contact high from the markers. Just been inking out some sketches and I always hate that smell of the pens, but all in the name of art, right?!? Hehe…just kidding.

Anyways, back on track here. (PS-The picture with the dog is from the calendar I made my family; last name Chock, one of their pups in named Coco…Count Chocula cereal rocks…you do the math.) Today went well, got up and did another progressive tempo run and it’s always nice to see some progress. Getting relatively faster, and I do stress the word relatively. 😉 Finished up with another tossing around of my baby weights, working on buffing out my arms…I’ll be a real meathead in no time!

Then spent some time working on some sketching and also finished what will be the third installment to the Supa’ Runna’s! (how does that name sound, I’m still not sold but again, the group name is still getting worked on.) Anyways, if it passes inspection by the applicant I’ll show you all tomorrow. So do check on back here.

That said, it’s happened…I broke down and watched The Bachelorette last night On Demand. There was SO much talk about it on FB, blogs, and the like that I cracked and figured I’d at least watch the first round. That way I can feel included when everyone else makes their predictions, makes fun of the guys who deserve it, and hate on the inevitable scumbags. This will be the first season I’ve watched any of the shows, including The Bachelor, so I didn’t know the whole backstory of Ashley going in. But they catch you up quite nicely so I feel pretty much up to speed.

So what are your guys’ thoughts? Did anyone else watch? Am I the only one who couldn’t help but laugh when some of the guys express just how romantic they are? I also want to know if you would ever go on a show like that? As either one of the 25 trying to win the final rose, or as the person doling out the roses? There’s the money perk, but even for that and a fifteen minute slot of fame, I don’t think I could handle the 24 hour surveillance. It would out all my crazy quirks, I’d no doubt end up looking like a fool, and I’m prrreeetty sure I wouldn’t find my soul mate. What say you?

1) Did you used to sniff those Mr. Scenty markers back in the day?

I have a really bad sense of smell actually and it takes a lot for me to catch a whiff of something (good or bad). But I never liked those things, they always gave me a headache after awhile.

2) Are you wrought with anticipation over the next running superhero?

Of but of course, and I know you all are too, don’t lie.

3) Are you jumping aboard this Bachelorette gossip blitz train, either by will or peer pressure? Have you watched the previous seasons?

Our Second Superhero and It’s Friday, Baby!

Posted on May 20, 2011 by Cait — 3 Comments ↓

Yay it’s Friday! AND the sun is shining. I must say it’s nice to wake up and see some rays of light poking out through those blinds. I’m also really stoked that with the warmer weather I can really stick it to PG and stop paying them out the wazoo on my utilities bill! Huurah!

It’s my fault, there are some things that I just refuse to suffer through and one of those is being cold, so even though I of course don the long sleeves and pants in the house I refuse to be uncomfortably chilly. I think part of this goes back to when I was growing up and my dad was a bit of a temperature control freak. He barely let us use the AC during the summers and then was skimpy on the heater in the winters. I’ve already established how much I dislike being too hot or too cold so now that I’m ‘all growed up’ it’s one of my sticking points.

Mooooving on. Okay, so isn’t is beautiful how you can feel pretty good one day and then like total @$$-monkeys the next? I’m referring to my run today, in case you’re scratching your head. Had a nice tempo yesterday but I was paying for it today. Gotta love that.

Speaking of, we’ve gotten our second addition to the Running Super Group. Hmm, I have yet to come up with a really good name for this new breed of Superheros…so the name is going to be a bit up in the air for now. But here’s the story with the new guy: (Note: I’m going to keep it clean for our fair viewers…hehe…my dad doesn’t like me to cuss, I’m trying to be better)

It was the final 200 of the final lap on the final repeat, he could feel his hamstring complaining at him but told it to once again shut up. He’d finally gotten to a point where he was able to run pretty fast without it actually screaming in pain. He’d had a good workout thus far and he’d be da**ed if he wasn’t going to finish off with his fastest one. He look at his training partner running just off his shoulder, purring along, they both nodded in agreement, picked up the pace and started to really hammer.

Rounding the turn they were on. They kept pushing until they both saw the obstruction up ahead in the middle of lane one down the homestretch. It was two ladies getting in their brisk walk, chatting no doubt about how nice the weather had been getting, ignorant of the two harriers panting their way through a self-inflicted torture session. Our running friend looked at his partner in mutually understood annoyance as they both swung out far into lane four to finish, stopping their watches. At least it was their fastest interval. He slapped his training partner on the back and went to change out of his spikes. The two ladies had made it just to the start/finish line themselves and quipped, “Wow, you guys looked like you were going fast.”

Later that night, having showered off and devoured most of a pizza, okay and truth be told a few beers too, our running friend plopped to the other place that was probably just as much of a staple in his life as his running: in front of the computer. He had a few status updates to attend to and oh, did we mention a few message boards to frequent as well? It wasn’t too long until his mouth dropped open in gaping horror…a few cookie crumbs (he’d earned a few after all) sprayed onto the screen. “No, this is just too heinously ridiculous to be true!” he thought, though on the heels of that he couldn’t stop a fit of laughter from taking over. After composing himself he decided that there may be a way for him to prevent such a ridiculous event to occur. It was a known fact that doping in the track scene had gotten to a despicable level, and he’d be da**ed if yet another noted athlete would fall victim to just such an abominable act.

And thus, The Cranky Hamstring was born. In a freak twist of chance it was in that moment of utter outrage and hilarity that the time continuum was ripped. A chasm opened up from that computer, through the message boards he flew, and was spit out on the other side. He recognized the trophies on the wall, the medals, the lush pad. “Well, I know for da**ed sure this couldn’t be the house of a distance runner. It must be a sprinter’s salary,” he thought. And then it dawned on him. He knew where he was and he knew what had to be done. And so he burst into the room…

Below is the following comic, our second edition on the heels of The Kankled Avenger. I’d like to take a minute to back up because maybe not everyone knows what this whole thing was referring to…so if you don’t follow track and fields related news, last year there was a noted sprinter who tested positive for performance enhancing drugs. He claimed he tested positive not because he was knowing trying to ‘roid up but because of something that was in the male enhancement products he was taking. Anyways, I’m not trying to point the finger of blame, or say one way or the other what the truth may or may not be (wow, I sound like a political candidate here), I’m just poking fun at the whole situation in general.

Okay, I’m sorry if I’ve geeked out too much here for those who aren’t running nerds, but I was in a drawing mood yesterday and wanted to add this to the Superhero chain. At any rate, I hope your Friday is plugging along and you’ve got some fun stuff planned for the weekend! 🙂

1) What is something you refuse to be cheap about and will shell out for?

2) What’s the worst thing you’ve ever cheated on?

I’m so lame, I never cheated off of anyone else because I know I’d just be too guilty to not confess. But I let a girl cheat off of my homework in 5th grade, we got caught and I kid you not I felt guilty for way too long.

Canes, Winco, and The Kankled Avenger

Posted on May 18, 2011 by Cait — 3 Comments ↓

Happy Wednesday! Okay, I have a couple random thoughts to share for today, so here goes. The fist thing I’ve been informed of is that the new hot fashion trend is a cane. Alright, don’t fault me for not becoming aware of this news when it firs premiered on Kourtney and Kim because I really only catch the reruns of that one every now and again. I’ve kind of decided that the they are the two most boring of the bunch so pairing them up for an entire show doesn’t hold much promise in my book. BUT there is the gem that is Scott Disick and usually offers up at least some entertainment value. But I think for the most part it’s wholly unintentional because he is being dead serious with what he is saying.

Anyways, I just now saw the one where he’s decided that because he is the latest fashion icon it was high time he found a distinguishing item for himself. A cane. If I knew how hot canes were going to be, I should have tried to one-up the trend, pulled out my bedazzler, and got to work on them crutches.

Second item for today, Winco. I love Winco, actually. I know some people probably think it’s totally grungy or seedy (I mean they don’t accept credit cards and if you pay with a check they really do ask for your ID and they won’t accept any out of state checks.) but I’m a total cheapo and if I’m going to save a few bucks I really don’t care at all. In fact a Winco shopping trip is a fun experience not to be missed, take that Safeway. Here’s why I love Winco:

1) Greeting Sam the bearded homeless guy who hangs out in front of the bottle return. They actually have people on Winco staff in charge of shooing Sam and his friends away but you can’t keep a good dog down.

2) Getting evil looks from the three punk kids just hanging out in front of the shopping carts. I think they call themselves emos, the ones that are really just much cooler than any of us losers who dare crack a smile.

3) Screaming kids around every corner. Also trying not to run over one of these little brats wreaking havoc around the aisles, picking up cookies and throwing things around. Their moms never seem to care, they always travel in packs of about four or five and it kinda looks like even if you DID actually run over one of them their mom may or may not really care all that much.

4) The look of death from a person when you accidentally bump your cart into theirs. Like it’s a real moral offense, sorry, Bud, the aisles are just kind of narrow and your cart is hogging up most of it.

5) The check-out people wearing those latex type gloves. I like this because it kind of makes you wonder if they a) are afraid of picking some kind of disease up from the actual food they are scanning and you will later be eating b) are trying not to get sick from you, the people actually coming into contact with them or c) some other reason altogether which may be even scarier.

So, if you haven’t yet, hit this place up. I may sound snarky here, but I’m really not joking when I say their prices are insane…you will save a bundle. Oh, and I forgot to add that you do pack your own bags. But the BEST part of that is you get to control that little conveyor belt thing! YAY!

Last thing, in case you missed it yesterday, there is a new Runner Superhero on the block: The Kankled Avenger. I promised the first actual comic of that one so here ya go. In looking it over after I finished I realize that it kinda looks like the guy in the picture gets hit by this wayward driver. That wasn’t my intention, but rather it was a close call that caused him to dodge out of the way but in doing so he winded up in a face plant. I know all of us have had more than enough close calls so that is what I was going for. (I’m also kind of annoyed because with Blogger I can only make it so big without having the image quality look junky, but if you want a better look to read things better just click on the actual comic and it’ll pop up bigger.)

That’s it for today, hope your Wednesday is shaping up well. And if there is anyone reading this, I’ll ask you a few questions:

1) Do you watch any of the Kardashian shows?

2) Where do you do your grocery shopping?

3) Have you ever hit one of those big concrete pillars in a parking garage?

Yes, I have it was at a downtown Safeway, the pillar was bright yellow and it left a big yellow streak along the side of my car. Nice.

The Birth of The Kankled Avenger

Posted on May 17, 2011 by Cait — 3 Comments ↓

So I had thought that it was certainly time that us runners had a superhero all our own. I mean, okay, there is The Flash, but really he’s not really a runner runner per se. And besides, while he is out there supposedly hunting down the ‘real bad guys’ he seems to be ignoring the MANY other plagues of the runner. Wayward drivers, leashless dogs, people who don’t know that lane 1 is to run FASTER in, and all the rest of our banes. We need someone fighting on our side. Fear not fellow fleet-footed friends, our time has come…

The Story of The Kankled Avenger

She was a runner, just like many others. Had the itch for the miles, felt compelled to log more and more to nudge that weekly total up. Some were faster, some were slower, some were grueling, some were euphoric, and many more falling somewhere in-between. Plenty of society thought her mad for having such an affinity for track of all things, but that didn’t bother her. She actually kind of liked it and found her place amongst other fellow runners. A unique kinship, a quick wave to the stranger running on the opposite side of the road, others who just ‘got it.’

It was a pretty normal day, nothing out of the ordinary. She got up, laced up the shoes, set out for a run and started the watch. The first five minutes clicked off as per the usual, six minutes, then a rumble came from behind. Not just the regular rumble of an engine but more like the sound an 80 year old smoker for life makes as they hack up a really juicy wad of phlegm. The kind of sound coming from a car whose door is a different color from the body and the bumper is sagging more on the left side than the right.

The noise got louder and the runner knew it was just too close for comfort. BAM! She got it, the damage was done. No need to further detail the nastier parts, but needless to say it wasn’t pretty. She was patched up, it took some time, but she eventually got back to running. The reminders of the day though, were that of an atrocity usually only reserved for those who probably couldn’t run a mile if their lives depended on it. The ones who thought a farkleck came from a horse’s behind. This runner was left, along with her scars…a KANKLE!

She shuddered to admit it, pulling on the low cut sock that was the only kind that now fit, but it was a kankle she had. She figured that it was a just reward for making fun of kankle sufferers all her life, she never thought she’d ever have one. But, it was what it was and ‘eh, she could still run so whateves. And from there The Kankled Avenger was born.

From that day forward she felt compelled to take back the rights of the runner. There were plenty of things she could put on the list of offenders and she thought it high time to start checking them off. The hunt to make the roads, the tracks, the cross-country courses, the trails, and all other places a better place for the harrier. And so it begins…

Alright folks, as with any good annoying summer blockbuster (although don’t worry I’m fully aware this is hardly a blockbuster!) you gotta build up as much fanfare and also leave the audience with amble cliffhangers. So you get the background story today and the actual first episode tomorrow…sorry, I hate myself too.

ALSO, as with any good superhero, our Kankled Avenger needs a posse, a crew, some friends. She’s got a few in mind already but will be holding a casting call to anyone who thinks they’ve got the stuff. If you’d like to apply, please leave your resume as a comment. Let us know your name, preferred distance, distinguishing trait, why you should be chosen, and lastly the offense that tops your list as the runner’s bane.