Fear Factor Recasting – Overcoming the Fears We Battle

Cue Joe Rogan. So I am bringing you this post as a major alert: CHECK OUT DIS CHIC CHICKPEA…do it now!! Haha, now I usually try not to bust out the all caps in multi-word format that often because it is annoying, but Amy over there posted a poem she wrote that really is too amazing to ignore.

It’s about fear. It is ever-present but needs to be pushed out of our lives. She really puts it best, but it also got me thinking about fear and so now, as always, I can’t just shush-up and will ramble on with my two cents.

girl depressed

I think pushing fear from our lives in sort of like an ongoing battle, you shove one out the window and the door knocks with another. Sometimes I think it’s almost impossible to avoid opening the door, or I guess rather the door gets thrust open against your own will. So then, it’s up to you to rid yourself of the intruder.

There is also the little fear spectrum, or rather a speedometer. Worries and fears sort of blur together in my mind sometimes, and it’s a matter of placing a particular worry/fear on that odometer. Is it running at a 4 minute mile pace or is it walking at 20 min/mile pace? Sometimes it looks like a speed demon but when you stop and actually clock it, it’s going much slower than you thought. Sort of like that red sports car vs. the cops thing.

Amy’s poem also comes at really, a perfect time for me. I’ve got my own little knock-knocks on the fear door and actually, should I be completely truthful they’re already sitting in my lounge sipping coffee. I don’t like to really admit some things, I like to either be positive or make enough jokes out of it that I laugh it off, but then again I don’t like to lie or feel like I’m being a hypocrite either.

I would sort of feel like a hypocrite if I posted up this amazing poem about giving fear the finger and then not put the disclaimer that I’ve got my own fears and worries. I’m not sitting in an empty room, I’ve got Fear Nasties too. But, I also have other people in it besides fear and worry. Those people are there to help me oust Nasty Thing 1 and 2 out the window. In some cases those people are actually battling against the very same fear as you.

puppets in graveyard

Our Fear Nasties Graveyard

The tough thing I’ve learned is that those ‘good’ people are sometimes hard to find, the Fear Nasties can really crowd the room and the ‘good’ folks can get buried in the back. Here are the sticky points: 1) Identifying there ARE actually other people in the room besides you and the fear dudes 2) actually believing that they are there (yes, this is another step) 3) reaching out to them and saying you need their help and 4) actually getting the fear thangs out the window.

chock family

The Fam

Getting back to the fear speedometer, if the things are more just worries, sometimes you can take a step back and realize that you’re making them ‘faster’ than they really are in your mind and if you start thinking more rationally or logical you can come up with some sort of solution. If there IS no solution than your solution is that whatever it is may be out of your control, so the best you can do is accept that it is out of your control, then distract yourself until the thing works itself out or you learn something new about the situation. Push it out of your mind as best you can.

Lots of my ‘fears’ are actually just my over-worrying. Fear in my mind is more gripping, heart-stopping, or it’s an enormous weight that is pressing down on my chest. Fear seems shorter, or like a climactic eruption. Worries to me are the slow build…I think they can lead to the gigantic fear eruption as the weight just builds to a point where it feels like it’s crushing you.

Worries are more my problem. I’ve briefly brushed on that fact that I’ve got OCD where I made fun of myself, and if I told you all of my worries I’d laugh right along with you as I said them out loud. But laughing them off inside is far harder, and it’s a matter of forcing myself to discredit these worries. Of course I’ve got actual ‘real world’ worries too, like we ALL do…and there are becoming more of those, so that adds to my lounge room of folks with Starbucks cups.

As I again catch myself in an epic ramble, I don’t want to make this too personal, my intention was to identify that this particular poem is something we should all read, digest, then read again. Because it’s a reality check: do you want to keep living with Starbucks sipping, uninvited, fear nasties with a speed rating taking up space?

I know I don’t, and I know I’ve pushed plenty out of my room before with the help of the other ‘good’ people in the room. I think the digesting part for me has also been admitting that there will always be new fear/worries or whatever knocking on the door, some of them the very same worries I already pushed out before, and I need to really listen when they start knocking. When the knocking gets louder, barricade that d*** door and if the door bursts open anyways, rally the troops, open the windows, and get to chucking!

woman kicking butt

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Quick Crawl Out of the Cave, Running Memories, and Juk

Hey there friends!! I appreciate that you guys haven’t abandoned me while I’m totally lame-o and not being able to comment as much as I want/need to, they say those who don’t leave you during your snotty/poopy pants moments are the keepers!! 🙂

And do know that this whole situation is just plain not gonna fly for this sista so I’m working on it. Back on track here, let’s see, so I really appreciate that feedback I got on the whole training log and the motivational quotes. I do think that for those who use their blog as their training log that is a nice little double-whammy punch, and I think that whatever keeps you accountable is awesome!

In doing this whole thing, (side note, this project has been taking up most of my time for the past days, but I can’t really complain about spending my time surrounded by all things running can I?!?!) I realized that one of the most fun things to do is to go back and reread my old logs. I don’t keep a diary (I have tried many times, but after about a day or two the days become sporadic and drop off into Never Never Land) but a training log I’ve been consistent with for years.

Even when I was a gimpy bum and all I could do was the arm-bike Krankcycle, I still wrote it down. Partly out of habit, but also because I still think that documenting stuff is useful, I did have a ton of rehab shiznit. But every now and again I stumble upon my old log books and I get sucked into reading the days. I laugh, because some workouts or races I remember so vividly, that even though there are no pictures I can see it in my mind.

running picture

Oldie....Photo Credit Bill Leung

I don’t keep photo albums and I don’t scrapbook. Mostly because I really suck at remembering to take my camera wherever I go! But I can write about running/working out all day. The entries aren’t really much more than a line or two, unless it was an AWESOME run/workout for whatever reason, but those two lines are usually enough to document the day, stamp that memory.

I have some really funny moments, a few that still give me that little rush and happy dance feeling, some really sucky ones, and a few that make me cringe still to this day. (TMI warning…ya, altitude also does a number on my gurgly guts, I have a track workout that seriously the recovery was dashes to the bushes on the side.)

So when I find those old suckers it’s my little walk down memory lane.

runner's log cover

Possible Cover Mock-up

Jolting back to the here and now, I’m working on a cover for this sucker, and what the heck I’ll ask for some feedback. This one is for obviously Granite Bay High School, but I’m doing others for different teams/groups, and so that portion will be different.

Actually, because I’ve spent so much time on these, and there really are a lot of articles, tips, quotes, trivia, art, etc. that anyone who is getting into running or starting out might enjoy and benefit from, I’m thinking of offering them up here. If you, or anyone you know, (running teams, groups, and the like), might be interested in purchasing one, drop me a line or leave a comment and we can chit chat. 🙂

joby's juk

Other than that, gosh I’m boring today, so I’ll end with a little cartoon. This one, the story is that my Dad makes this soup called Juk. Does anyone know what that is? I think it’s some kind of either Chinese or Hawaiian soup dish, but he seriously loves this stuff to no end. I don’t like it, but that’s me. But the thing is that to make it u need a turkey carcass, it’s gross but he always asks people for theirs after Thanksgiving. So that’s the story behind this one…oh, and my dad’s name is…duh, Joby. 😉

1) What are some foods that a person in your family is ‘known’ for?

2) How do you ‘walk down memory lane’ if you do it? Photo albums, home movies, diaries, etc…heck, even I see people on Facebook doing it with albums on there!

3) How do you know a friend is a keeper?

It’s totally true, it’s the people who are there with the sh** starts to fly!

4) Would love some constructive crit over the cover…tear it to shreds peeps! 😉

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Sandy Pants, Racing for Your Cookies, and Techie Apps

And we’ve worked our way back to a Monday! Well, sorry for being a bit lame with the posts the past two days and I’ll catch you up to speed. Nothing too crazy exciting to report for Saturday, so I’ll use this as a chance to follow up on my mom’s bird story and share a picture of my lovely sis having fun at the lake up in Twain Harte.

beach

Sis and BF at the lake

First off cute pic…oooh, and awww time. PS-she’s with her boyfriend.

hawaii 2007

The sun...oh how it burns my eyes out

Actually, right about now I’ll use this as a chance to throw up another beach picture (wow, I wish I were at the beach right now!) but this one is from Hawaii back in 2007 I think. That little guy in the front is my youngest bro and he’s doing that ‘hang loose’ sign with his hands not trying to flash some rando gang sign. I’m the one on the far, top right looking like the sun is about ready to burn out my retinas…that’s because it was and my mom was on about take 50 of this photo.

On to the bird story…now, I warn you animal lovers that this one is not a happy ending type thing so you might just want to skip this paragraph. Anyways, the drive between Gramp’s house and my family’s house is about 2 hours and it’s through the woodsy, curvy NorCal district. Well, my mom and bro drove back from their trip later at night and when they got home they just ate and went to bed. The next day my mom went out to run some errands and there was a note pasted to her window shield that read, “You got a dead bird stuck in your car grill :)” (see picture below) Yes, somehow a poor birdie was hit by the car and wound up stuck on the car for probably about 12 hours…how did no one smell that? My dad had to tackle clean up duties for that one. I want to say that I’m NOT saying the actual event is funny, in fact sad for the birdier, but what I found comical was the fact that my mom totally didn’t notice it and had to have some stranger alert her to this nasty display going on on the front of her car…with a smiley at the end no less. I also laugh because it’s something that would totally happen to me. I’ll spare you any visual of said bird.

bird note

Bird note

Sunday night was SUPER fun because I paid a visit to one of my all favorite families…I’ll tell you they wind in a very close second. 😉 I actually have begged my way into being a floater adoptee child, thankfully they didn’t turn me away at the door. Mamma Nappy is actually the one for who I made up the little Cookie Race design for the day when she hosts her own race.

Cookie Race

Today I got in my tready run, just over 9 miles, hit the core and abs and got nice and sweaty. Now, I have something that I’d like some of your thoughts on. I got to thinking about how the whole social media and digital world has effected fitness, running, and training. There are a plethora of downloadable apps, online training coaches and trackers, iPod workouts, and even Facebook running apps. Not to mention the little sidebar widgets I see on many blogs announcing the latest workouts completed and all that fun stuff.

Now these apps run the gambit, those that can act as GPS trackers for pace, speed, distance, calories burned, the works, but there are also those that tout the ability to actually coach you to a faster PR. So what I’m curious about it just how reliable and for lack of a better term, good, are these things? As with everything you have to consider the source, and certainly some apps are better than others, but I was hoping to hear from anyone who’s used some of these things to share your experiences. I think that some of the apps for Facebook/blogs/etc where you can post your most recent workouts can offer a person up some positive feedback, encouragement, and maybe even a little bragging rights. That’s cool if it keeps them motivated to stick to their training and get er done. I’ve never downloaded one of those iPod workouts, with music and encouragement while you’re on the treadmill or elliptical, I wonder if hearing Jillian Michaels shout at me would be a kick in the tush to work harder or be just plain annoying.

Let’s hear the good, the bad, the ugly, and the cool things you’ve found in all things apps/widget/downloadable! I want to sort of revisit this whole online coaching thing later in another post, so stay tuned as I’ll be wanting to hear from any of you who have done/taken advantage of any sort of online coaching. 🙂 PS-these are all things that I’m writing an article about, so I could really use and would REALLY love any and all kinds of feedback!

Well, that’s that for now. I hope your week is off to a great start!

1) How do you handle sand getting everywhere at the beach?

Not gonna lie, I really don’t like feeling nitty gritty for days after I go to the beach, but I really don’t think there is any way to avoid it. That and a nice butt full of sandypants.

2) Have you ever hit anything (that was living) while driving? If so how did you react?

I’m SO thankful I’ve never (to my knowledge) hit anything, but if I did I think the guilt would just about eat me alive. My aunt once hit an armadillo while in Texas and she swore she had nightmares of its little beady eyes staring back at her.

3) Have you used any of these apps or techie things, if so, which ones? What are you experiences with some of them?

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