Runner’s Strip: The Pre-Run Routine – Get out the door and running before you grow a beard

Sometimes it feels like it can take an eternity before we actually get out the door for that run. Between taking care of all those creaks and squeaks, making sure the ‘guts’ and bladder are ready to roll, and WHY does that darn Garmin sometimes seem to be looking for that darn satellite by way of hot air balloon?! This doesn’t even take into the account the times where you know you’re purposefully stalling…c’mon, you really don’t need to check Facebook AGAIN. 😉
pre-run routine
It’s true, the runner’s pre-run routine may snowball at times, BUT I’ll tell you what, I like to run first thing in the morning and I’m also a total sucker for wanting every ounce of sleep so I’ve pared my routine down to about 10 minutes between eye ball crusty wiping and hitting the road. Here are some of my quick tips:

1) Lay all the gear out the night before. Shoes unlaced and sitting next to my pile of clothes, Garmin sitting (hooked up to the charger because I am petrified of it running out of batteries mid-run) next to my clothes.

2) Hit the bathroom. I give myself about 10 minutes to let my guts wake up (I allow myself this window of email/website/Facebook time...but I look at the clock and stick to just 10 minutes.) and off I go.

3) Start locating. I hit the ‘locate’ button for my Garmin when I go into the bathroom to let that sucker start up. On my way out it’s done 99% percent of the time.

BOOM. I’m out…no more farting around for this girl. I will say that I have a finicky stomach so I eat a big snack before going to bed at night and then don’t eat in the morning. If you DO need to eat before your AM run:

* Nightstand nosh: I’ve had friends leave an energy bar on their nightstand and wake up in the night to eat it, then roll back to bed.

* Liquid nutrients: Drinking something with sustenance when you’re close to run time can often be easier than handling food if your stomach is sensitive.

* Nighttime bedding: If you need an extra hour or so before your AM run to eat, get to bed earlier and be strict about it. Sleep is incredibly important for runners, so don’t skimp there…you can use the extra morning hour to do things you would have done the night before. Getting sucked into YouTube gems included.

Here’s to getting to that run before that first Cup ‘o Joe wears off! 😉
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Check out my post on taking care of those runner pops, squeaks, creaks, and niggling injuries.

Check out my post on pre-run nutrition and finding foods that will sit well in your stomach and timing your fuel.

Check out my post on liquid nutrients.

Check out my post on GI issues for runners.

Check out my post on sleep for runners.

Check out more Runner’s Strip cartoonage!

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1) What usually takes the longest in your pre-run routine?

2) What are some of the runner rehab elements you do to take care of the ‘old bod’?
Plantar rolling and leg swings are staples.

3) Do you drink coffee before your runs?
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Runner-Speak: A runner’s unsaid language defined

Runners, we really have our own language. True there are the actual words: fartlek, tempo, IT band, nip-guards, chaffage, etc. that we toss around. But there is the running BODY language that sometimes emotes much more than anything that could possibly be vocalized. Enter Runner-Speak…

runner-speak cartoon

I hope you enjoy my little Sunday Runner Cartoon. Get some giggles, then go make sure your Garmin is charged and able to pick up a signal. 😉
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If you want some more cartoonage you can see some of my other Runner’s Strip cartoons HERE, HERE, and HERE!! 🙂
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1) Any of those Runner-Speak pictures look familiar? Which one was the last you expressed?

2) What’s another Runner-Speak body tell that’s not pictured?

3) What are you doing with your fine runner self this Sunday? Runs, races, workouts, let’s hear it! 🙂

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The Conundrum of a Runner’s Path Impeded: When your way is blocked you have a decision to make

You’re running along, fully in your zone, you look forward and BAM…impending pedestrian traffic jam. We’ve got a case of people walking four wide, no way to easily pass by, you’re faced with the blocked runner’s pivotal decision: What to do?
blocked runner
I do my best to always be a polite runner, I give people the benefit of the doubt for the most part, maybe they are unaware just HOW much sidewalk they are taking up. Perhaps they feel the need to monopolize the entire bike path.

I’m a fan of the subtle cough, pretend like you’d just be clearing your throat anyways and they just happen to be in earshot. I like the subtle hints.

If I’m in the middle of a hard workout or on the track I’ve got no qualms shouting, “Left” or “Track”. I’m annoyed but mostly for loss of breath…lol.

Though we ALL have those days, sometimes it’s toward the end of a run and unfortunately for the people who act as the straw to break the runners’ patience you have HAD it with people in your way. Enter the agitated runner who’s had their nerves worn thin thanks to a series of blockades through the course of their run.

We can find solace and acceptance here, among runner friends, to confess away our agitated runner sins, purge ourselves of guilt and repent. “I’m really not a mean person, it’s just that last mile, the pack of walkers on the full horizontal, I’d had to swerve just TOO many times before them.”

It’s okay my children, I’ve been there, I know the tough spot you’re forced into thanks to oblivious pedestrians.

You are forgiven.

1) How are you when you see a big blockade approaching when you’re running? Do you tend to be cordial?

2) When you SNAP is it usually relative to the kind of day you’ve had overall or what’s already happened in the run?

3) What’s the best story of a runner SNAPPING and unleashing on unsuspecting, blocking pedestrians you’re seen, heard, or *gasp* been a part of? We’ll call it a runner going over the edge. 😉

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It’s a Treadmill War: There will be losers and potentially collateral damage

The line of treadmills at the gym is like a runner’s minefield. Sometimes you enter, innocently minding your own business, start up the belt happily going about your scheduled run and BAM!!! TREADMILL WAR!!
treadmill war
You unassumingly are turned into the opposing party when Jon or Janette Ego Doe on the next treadmill over have decided to make it their mission to beat you.

Signs that you’ve been turned into General Fartlek:
* Tell tale beeps from the next treadmill over
* Increased huffing and puffing resonating from next treadmill
* Peeking Tom/Tammy looking over your shoulder (why do these people think they can try and casually disguise their obvious leering?)

Sometimes it’s fun to mess with them, we’re all human. Go on the offensive with these power moves:
* Pace zagger:
We don’t zig because we only go one way, and that is UP
* Nose breather: Admit it, you know you start making your breathing even quieter on purpose
* Smile: Kill them with kindness and flash them an ‘I know what you’re doing’ smile

And the Reward:
* Winning, right?

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Speaking of wars…the September Miles Madness Competition is headed into its final countdown! This Week 4 will include all the days that take us to the end of September, so make your final totals and update the Google doc…we want to WIN!! 🙂
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Blatant Pimping My New Shirts: Check my awesome store, peeps! 😉

1) Do you have a funny treadmill war story?
Actually I DO but the best one doesn’t involve me; so let’s just say the above cartoon is based off of real life events.

2) Have you ever instigaetd a treadmill war? Fess up!

3) What’s your Saturday run on plan??

The REAL Reason We All Run…

Well, it’s to stuff our runner faces of course!

runner math

Legit.


I jest, I jest…well, at least to a degree. I bring this up not because my stomach is alerting me it’s definitely lunch time but because I’d like to direct you to a fun new cartoon that will be periodically featured over at Skinny Runner. Yea, that’s right, when in doubt outsource your work to the REAL blogs out there, the heavy hitters. 😉

Just kidding, actually her blog’s hilarious so go check it out if you haven’t yet. And today you’ll see the first Skinny Runner Comic being featured. Go now, I’ll pause for just a minute…

…so in keeping with the theme there, what do you run for, when your mind starts to stray to the salivary glands among those miles? When some sweat drips over you lips do you pretend that it’s really some pizza salt?? I’m more of a sweets person myself.
cake runner
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Runner nutrition is very important, and while of COURSE we all love to stuff our faces we do need to remember that fueling our body right is directly linked to our performances. Moderation and balance and all that. Here are some past articles tackling running nutrition more seriously:
Going Gluten Free
Is It Really That Bad?
30 Minute Post-Run Refuel Window
Timing Your Fuel and Limiting the Running Variables

I LOVED to see how many of you really connected with yesterday’s post; I got more comments, messages, and tweets than I typically do which goes to show just how much EVERYONE thinks about body image. And the men too…I didn’t mean to disclude them at all, because runnerdudes have the hang-ups just like the runnerchicks. But the bottom line is that running has helped us all gain perspective and while it’s probably impossible to ignore them completely, remembering that if you’re blitzing by someone, as you run past who cares if you’re calfs are skinny, your thighs have a dimple or two, your waist is a box, you’re AAAAA or DD, or your man-pecs are on the tinier side? I’m pretty sure you just kicked some runner @$$. 😉
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1) When the mind wanders to foodage during those runs, where does it go?

2) How do you balance the good stuff with the GOOD stuff in your diet? Haha…I think you know what I mean.
I do eat healthy, not just Pop-Tarts and ice cream, my little brainworkings are: 1) aim to reach my protein goal for the day (the carbo’s are way easy for me to fill that quota) 2) get my fruits and veggies 3) then whatever is ‘left’ can be the ‘fun’ foods or make sure I get enough of the calories.

3) That said I know some foods cause a LOT of GI distress and can make your body feel like total crap. What are some foods, even if you may like the taste, do you avoid?
I thank the heavens above that I’m not gluten-intolerant…that’s all I have to say.

Finish Line Face: A runner’s grimace-smile as they head for home

You’re running toward the finish line, eyes dead ahead and your face is contorted into some kind of grimace-smile. You’re digging for that extra gear, the lactic acid feels about up to your eyeballs but you spot the line, incentive to keep going. Enter Finish Line Face.
finish line face woman running
It’s strange how the very last bit of your race, the bell of the last lap, the view of the finishing line is at both the most painful yet ‘easiest’ part of all. The end is in sight, you can taste it, the competitive drives kicks in and the desire to push it overrides the built up muscle fatigue.

Now, not all runners are blessed as ‘natural kickers’, or the ones who possess enough fast twitch muscle fibers and raw speed to easily find that extra gear at the end. However, everyone can work on their base speed; yea it’s unfortunate that tapping into that extra gear will take some more work (ie: searching)…but isn’t hard work what defines distance running?
finish line face man running
Speed sessions and short intervals aside, there are other factors that can improve you finish. You’ll probably still have a touch of Finish Line Face but next time you’re barreling for home remember:

* Relax: Don’t clench your jaw, make sure your shoulders are dropped, your arms are swinging front to back and are ‘loose.’ Holding tension in your face, shoulders, and fists is energy being spent, and it’s not being spent productively; it’s also doing damage to your form.

* Form Check: Nice segue, because your form can naturally start to slip as you tire. Working on your form, with core strength exercises and drills, ensures you’ll be able to stand up tall when you’re tired, like at the end of a race.

* Strides: Counting your strides, or thinking about your stride rate does two things: it makes sure you’re being an efficient runner but it also helps distract your brain from thinking of how much pain you’re in. A stride is counting on a single leg, as it makes a complete running cycle. Think strides, not pain. Aim for 90 strides per minute.

* Dead Ahead: Don’t lose sight of the finish, it offers motivation and by looking forward you’re helping keep good form too. Key in on runners you can pass at the line too and go after them!

Finish Line Face…so long as you’re not clenching your jaw, embrace those grimace-smiles and find that extra gear!

1) Do you tend to make a particular face while running or racing?
I’ve been called Popeye before.

2) How do you make sure to keep yourself relaxed when you’re trying to run hard?
I shake out my arms and make sure my shoulders are relaxed.

3) What’s your form pit-fall, the thing that starts to slip when you get tired?
My arms start to swing like a hummingbird. 😛

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Hot Runner Deals!! Score at the Track and on the Cross-Country Course…but Beware of the Spit Zone

Have you checked out these signs lately, it sure looks like runners all over are getting offered some pretty sweet deals?!
track sign
Watch out who you line up against at the track…nevermind, I’m sure you’ll be the one offering up the free butt kickings rather than the other way around.
cross country running sign
Mud at the cross-country course is a given, but you decide whether the splattering will end up on your frontside or your backside. Same goes for all those trail runners.

But look-out for these hazard signs..don’t want to wind up in the Spit Zone when a rogue loogie flies your way.
runner spitting
man runner spitting
Stay safe and fast my runner peeps! 🙂

1) Which do you prefer more, track or cross-country? Or are you more in favor of trail racing, road racing?

2) Spitting zone, which shoulder do you typically send them loogies over?

3) If you had a sign posted after your last run, what would it read?

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Running to Fight Rage and Hopefully PR: This run brought to you by spite and frustration

We all run for many different reasons, but do you ever have a run fueled purely by rage? Ever feel like if you don’t make a mad dash for the door in your running shoes you’re at the risk of slipping into one of those anger fugues? You black out and when you finally come to there’s carnage around you…people around you look like they’ve seen Godzilla?
run pissed
Rage happens, folks, and it’s a serious issue. So please, help fight the cause and support RTFRAHPR (Running To Fight Rage And Hopefully PR). Donate as many miles as you can, give with your hearts and your legs. Run until your muscles burn more than your pent up frustrations. In the end we’ll all win out.

It doesn’t take much, and your charitable donation of any size can save a little boy or girl. Maybe one named Alice or Dominic; maybe a pimply check-out boy at the grocery store, a bank teller who can’t add, the police officer who pulled you over for the broken tail light, the temp worker who broke the copy machine but refuses to fess up.
pissed runner
It’s okay, rage happens to the best of us, but next time you feel like you’re about to boil over, do the right thing and donate some miles. Blast a tempo run fueled purely by spite. Gut through a long run, mentally ranting and raving…you’ll certainly be helping yourself, your training, and poor, defenseless, incompetent Alice.
angry runners
To make a donation to the RTFRAHPR just lace up and go.

1) Stress and anger, do you sometimes look forward to your run especially after a really nasty day? Do you find running acts as a sort of release?

2) Have you been able to actually solve problems or come up with ways to get rid of some of that stress while on your runs?
Yup.

3) How many miles were you able to donate to the RTFRAHPR fund today?? 😉

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I’m All About Staying Positive…But Sometimes to Get That Smile You Need to Bust Out the Sarcasm!

Running, and life, can be hard, it can be daunting, it can be amazing, it can be scary, it can wreck you with nerves, leave you inspired to be better, bring you down just as fast, have days where you feel just ‘meh’ and just about all else. I’ve harped a lot on staying positive throughout, even forcing that darned smile even when it feels fake, in order to whether the ‘lows’ so you can reach the ‘highs.’
runner
That said, I’m sarcastic as heck and quite frankly life is too flipping hilarious, even that sick ironic kind of humor, NOT to laugh at it. Sometime it’s okay to indulge in that snarky side of yourself and laugh…even if it’s on the inside. Case in point…

You’d have to live in a box not to know that Olympic Trials are underway. At a gathering the other day the topic of the Trials came up. “When are they starting?” Person A. “Well, the hammer throw is on the 21st but everything else gears up on the 22nd,” Me. “Wait, but I was watching the diving on TV the other day, so it’s already going on,” Person A. “Diving?!?! Seriously, ummm, sorry when I said I’m excited for the Trials to start I thought it was obviously implied I meant the running events,” Me…alas, only in my head though.

On the bike trail doing my cool-down after a workout a biker approaches from behind, “Get the he## off the paved part, runner!” In my head, “Say what?!?! Get off your high horse biker, if I thought I might not get my arm ripped off I’d try and clothes line you.” Instead of saying anything though I just ran in a zig-zag to peeve him off…of yes, I admit to a moment of being the smaller person.

Earlier on the bike trail during a tempo, this time a biker is approaching me, “Great pace, keep it up!” He whizzed past me and in my head, “Dear lord, I’m glad he can’t look down at my watch and see my actual splits, he’d certainly take back that comment!” BOOM…I just gave an example of what not to think when you’re hurting in a workout…bad me! To my credit, I did catch myself and promptly replied, “Eh, take the little ego boost from the compliment and stay focused…shake out your arms, I see from that shadow they are flapping around like hummingbird wings.”
pancake run
I’ve also had people comment to me while running, “Nice stride.” Okay, my snarky thoughts to this one are, “Obviously you have no clue about running because this is about as ambiguous a compliment as it can be. I see you are at least trying to be nice, but seriously, nice stride…you’d be better off just saying, ‘Nice shoes’.”
vibram shoes
For this one I’m just a fly on the wall, details will be withheld to protect the guilty…lol. A man announces he is going for a run…kudos to him. About 15 minutes, maybe, the door bursts back open and the man is back. A person inquires, “Are you done with your run?” The runner replies, “Yup.” This snarky fly on the wall thinks, “What?! Did you get at least two miles in there, I hope so, or else that’s almost a waste of getting suited up for!” 😛

A friend recently tried to rope me into running an 800 with them. #thereisnowayinheck #onespeedrunnerwithnofasttwitchmuscles
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Track Trials News: Now all of us distance people were super stoked for the first day, talk about busting out of the gates with a BOOM with the 10k’s right away! 🙂 I’m beyond stoked that one Dathan Ritzenhein is off to London; he’s one of the grittiest runners around, and who didn’t share a little heart-break after his marathon? Not going to lie thought I called it that he’d be making the team in the 10k. Galen Rupp won (27:25), Matt Tegenkamp (27:33), and Dathan Ritzenhein (27:36).

For the women, hats off to Amy Hastings pulling off the win and in a similar ‘redemption mode’ as Dathan after her own Olympic Marathon Trials race. Hasting for the win (31:58), Natosha Rogers (31:59), and Shalane Flanagan in third (31:59). Here it’s a little tricky, with the Olympic A Standard Qualifying Time and the fact Shalane won’t run the 10k, the women’s team will be Hasting, Lisa Uhl (4th), and Janet Cherobon-Bawcom (7th).

Congrats to all the runners busting their bums out there!!
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1) Would you like to add any snarky, sarcastic running related barbs to the list? Or do you have anything else to give us a giggle this Friday?

2) What is sort of your ‘minimum’ distance for a ‘real’ run in your mind? Barring cases like injuries and such.
Four miles, unless it’s a double.

3) Which would be your least favorite event to race? What is your favorite distance?
Quite honestly I don’t feel like my old legs are able to handle the shock of anything less than at least a 5k…it takes some time even after a warm-up for them to wrangle up anything that might be considered a ‘race’ pace. 😛

4) Olympic Trials: give me your comments, reactions, thoughts, who you were/are rooting for…I want it all! 🙂

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You Can’t Win if You Melt First…

Running in the heat sucks…
melting runners
It’s a Friday so I think we should kick the weekend off laughing. That said, I’m pretty sure I’ve left more than my fair share of melted person on the track in my time.

Today’s going to be short and sweet but I will also give you a refresher course on all things crazy hot and hydration related with some of my previous posts. Summer weather is hitting us full swing and here’s to hoping you don’t wind up a puddle of runner goo! 🙂

Runners Are Hot: Staying hydrated on the run

All About Liquids: What to drink and when

To Tote or Not to Tote: Carrying water-bottles on the run

The Great Smoothie Debate

1) Are you one of the runners who tend to run better than most in the heat? Do you tend to suffer more than others?

2) Do you live in an area with the dry heat or do you have the humid factor too?

3) How do you handle the heat where you live and your best survival tip?

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